Sometimes something catches my eye and draws me in and makes me feel like painting it. I don't want it to look like a photo, a photo is wahat you see everyday with your eyes. Some sights make me want to take the image and turn the volume up just a little, not too much. Too much crosses over to annoying. See how the whites of the posts are a little whiter than maybe in real life? See how the shadows in the foliage are darker than maybe in real life? They work together with the colors of the mailboxes all in a row so that it's like strumming a visual guitar and the colors are the notes... the colors are the notes and the composition is the order they are played in. There are movements and stops. Do you see what I'm saying? Am I going on as if mad because it's late? Am I going on as if mad because I am? Lately I feel mad. Lately I feel different. I feel restlessly weary and anxious. I want to move onto something else in life. Not away from 2draw, no I don't mean that, I mean in life. I'm tired of doing what society has conditioned me to believe is what I am expected to do, or what is "responible" I don't know, I want to quit all this running around trying to keep my head above water. I want less material things and more time to stop and sit and enjoy being me with the time I have left. The thought of doing all of this domesticated keep up with the bills and house and yard and cars and work untill I'm too damn old and have little time left makes me sick. This isn't living, this working and struggeling and paying and comprimising and following someone elses time schedule and soing for them that they may succeed finacialy, I'm talking about working for someone else, making it work for them so that they get a raise or whatever. I want me to be mine and what life I have left to be mine. I'm tired, I'm tired, I'm tired and I don't believe in our government anymore, not one damn shred of it. This country is no longer the Amreica I was tought about. It's still called that, but no. So screw it I say, screw the whole god damn concept of little pink house for you and me. Leave me the hell alone. Somehow I've got to get out from under all of this. Scrape together enough to buy a place to live outright and become independant of the fucking monster called the american way. I want to unplug and be left to either flourish or die on my own. My god.... 43 years and I'm nowhere. I've done nothing but try to win this god damn rat race and guess what...joke is on me, there is no end to the maze, they keep changing it and I just keep running and running and running thinking that soon I will find it, soon I will get my just reward. HA! Stupid stupid little man, you are but a highly expendable tiny little pawn, a cog in a huge machine designed to make a few selfish bastards rich. There are probably more spelling and grammer mistakes in this that you may find acceptable...that you may find acceptable... eat me.
I understand ... I really, really do. You're a thousand steps in front of everyone else just because you realize you're in a "rat race" you can't win.
(and I don't want my pictures to look like the photos either, it's much more difficult to make them look like paintings, but I'm not talented enough to do that... not in 24 hours, much less 24 minutes)
EDIT: If you don't mind, I'll just take a moment to do a little ranting of my own. Two days ago I got my usual letter from our "government".... from Social Security, addressed to Cynthia Lightford (yes, that's me)... stating that although I worked, let's see 18 years for someone else, paid my taxes, "hello", we changed the rules honey, you don't get that back at all, ever. You didn't work those years consecutively because you took some time out to have children... (that's what I did)... You will now have to go back to work and work 5 years consecutively, and we'll pay you the money we are now saying we just stole from you (to support all the old f****** driving Winnebagos and pulling Cadillacs today)... and although I file jointly with my husband who is self-employed, and I still PAY social security taxes, it's figured in, but it doesn't COUNT towards paying me back, ever. (and I'm editing again because I think it's relevant to add that I did not sit on my ass and watch my husband work for all these years to build his business, I WORKED, and I still do... when he didn't have enough help I tied steel for slabs in 106 degrees, burning my hands, helped him load up his equipment time after time, which is one reason I have a broken back today, stayed up late typing proposals and doing... TAXES...and they took out social security for those years and it doesn't COUNT, either) Who is to say that if I did go back to work 5 years consecutively for someone else that they won't change the rules AGAIN and screw me out of it with a letter again. So some of my generation is going to end up living in a refrigerator box under a bridge when we're old, so what? Yeah, I understand how you feel. Screw the government, screw everything in general.
Dan..you said what has been in my head for the last 5 years ..so I keep buying powerball tickets..and hoping. I spend all day stressing so some 30 something snot-nosed investment banker type can close on a too-big house and fix his eighty thousand dollar SUV because he backed into a pole while he was distracted with his Blackberry and his satellite in-dash TV. ..writes note..buy powerball ticket
I will not write a story to exsplain how i feel for this piece but whst i will do is just type this.
I think its great it doesn't remind me much of forest gump but with the white sand at the bottom it reminds me of florida keys.
It's 3:10 am. I havent slept in a couple days. I'm going to work now. I'm going because if I don't, people I love will suffer. Thats the trap in the rat race that makes me keep gettng back on the treadmill, pumping out little gold nuggets for someone else to collect so that at the end of the month they'll br3eak off a tiny piece of one for me, just enough to allow me not to die so that I can continue getting on my treadmill to produce. Chickens in boxes laying eggs for owners, Chickens in boxes laying eggs for owners, Chickens in boxes laying eggs for owners, Chickens in boxes laying eggs for owners. Being fed just enough to keep me producing. As soon as I stop, get rid of this one, put a new one in his box.
Well.I'm sure the family thinks more of you than just a chicken in a box..but I sure know that feeling..there should be so much more in life than feeling that..
Omlets are good i like eggs and rice eggs and suasage eggs with bread, sunnyside up eggs upside down egges, eggs with grits, egg sandwiches, eggs and shrimp.......
Axil society sux ass i fucking hate working for the man day by day and for nothing it seem all i ver habve is enough to eat a small meal and barel pay my bills while some rich ass w hole who controls, starts and can end my work life sits backs or takes week long vacations many times a year collecting checks from money wich i killed my self to make for the damn company.
If there were no rich assholes, who would pay your wages, JK? If you don't like making him rich, start your own company and become a rich asshole, yourself. You like eggs.. how about a restaurant, specializing in egg dishes?
And btw, I like this picture. It's one of your best, Dan.
hey...I have an idea! you are a SUPERLATIVE ARTIST...why don't you sell your art and eventually open your own fricken gallery?? many of the other incredible artists here could pay you to show their art too. Then you can go put your feet in some white sand and feel more serene. Just a thought....it would get you off the 'treadmill'...
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drawn in 24 min
(and I don't want my pictures to look like the photos either, it's much more difficult to make them look like paintings, but I'm not talented enough to do that... not in 24 hours, much less 24 minutes)
EDIT: If you don't mind, I'll just take a moment to do a little ranting of my own. Two days ago I got my usual letter from our "government".... from Social Security, addressed to Cynthia Lightford (yes, that's me)... stating that although I worked, let's see 18 years for someone else, paid my taxes, "hello", we changed the rules honey, you don't get that back at all, ever. You didn't work those years consecutively because you took some time out to have children... (that's what I did)... You will now have to go back to work and work 5 years consecutively, and we'll pay you the money we are now saying we just stole from you (to support all the old f****** driving Winnebagos and pulling Cadillacs today)... and although I file jointly with my husband who is self-employed, and I still PAY social security taxes, it's figured in, but it doesn't COUNT towards paying me back, ever. (and I'm editing again because I think it's relevant to add that I did not sit on my ass and watch my husband work for all these years to build his business, I WORKED, and I still do... when he didn't have enough help I tied steel for slabs in 106 degrees, burning my hands, helped him load up his equipment time after time, which is one reason I have a broken back today, stayed up late typing proposals and doing... TAXES...and they took out social security for those years and it doesn't COUNT, either) Who is to say that if I did go back to work 5 years consecutively for someone else that they won't change the rules AGAIN and screw me out of it with a letter again. So some of my generation is going to end up living in a refrigerator box under a bridge when we're old, so what? Yeah, I understand how you feel. Screw the government, screw everything in general.
I think its great it doesn't remind me much of forest gump but with the white sand at the bottom it reminds me of florida keys.
Axil society sux ass i fucking hate working for the man day by day and for nothing it seem all i ver habve is enough to eat a small meal and barel pay my bills while some rich ass w hole who controls, starts and can end my work life sits backs or takes week long vacations many times a year collecting checks from money wich i killed my self to make for the damn company.
And btw, I like this picture. It's one of your best, Dan.
I think we all suffer from an inate need for something more that is never fulfilled.